Irony is lost on Wirral burglars (From Wirral Globe)
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Irony is lost on Wirral burglars
12:46pm Tuesday 15th January 2013 in Letters
I READ many letters in your columns from people who have had the misfortune to be burgled, mugged, robbed etc.
Invariably, their letters begin with "I would like to thank" or "I would like to congratulate" the perpetrators of these crimes, this annoys me because the irony is probably lost on the lowlife who do these things.
May I suggest that these letters should start as follows: " I would like to throttle/drown/set fire to".
Alan Moffat, Wallasey.
bickyboy says...
9:51am Thu 17 Jan 13
Problem is that the alternatives you suggest are probably a little too potent for the average family newspaper.
How about, "I would love to offer said perpetrator an olive branch and a chance to explain his actions, over a cup of strychnine-enhanced Earl Grey"?